Tuesday, October 15, 2013


This is something that me and Sœur Melville came up with and I lost it. 

How to look French (men)
1. Carry a baguette properly. Under the elbow, between your side and your elbow. You then tuck your hand into your pocket. It takes a lot of skill and practice to balance a baguette like that, but the French men have mastered carrying a baguette with no hands.

2. Wear pointy shoes. The pointier the better. I think French men use their shoes as weapons.

3. Wear tight pants – really, really tight pants. None of these baggy comfortable pants that are found in America - you should barely be able to sit down. They should also cut off above the ankle, so make sure you have classy socks!

4. Carry a purse. The cool kind is a side bag about the size of a Book of Mormon.

5. Play a random sport or do a unique form of exercise. There is a man in our complex that goes out jumping for exercise. He just jumps around our little shopping area. Great work out. Another man does yoga/stretching every morning on the back of the train on the way to work. Roller blading is very popular here. Some people just wear roller blades instead of shoes - why not? You get around so much faster!

7. If you are interested in a woman, shout WOMAN at her and hope that she looks back and starts a conversation. 

How to look French (women)

1. Don’t do your hair. Simply let it be crazy, or put it messily into a bun on the top of your head. But do not brush or do anything with your hair. The less you do the cuter it is! It sounds like I'm being sarcastic, but these French girls do pull it off and look so classy!

2. Always carry purses/bags/etc. on your elbow. 

3. Don't eat in public.  The only time to eat is between 8 pm and 11 pm, and then it should be a long dinner with several course and plates. Whenever you do eat, it should last a few hours.

4. Strap your baby to your chest. Now your hands are fully available!

5. Be extremely skinny. Now, I'm not sure how they do that exactly... definitely not something I've mastered yet. But these French women have legs the size of my arms!

How to look French (youngins)

1. Hang out at the local LDS meetinghouse. 

2. When you see missionaries STARE at their nametags. Don’t break eye contact with that name tag! Make sure to loudly tell everyone on the bus about the crazy sight you have seen as well!

3. Ride scooters everywhere and rollerblade! Since you can't drive in France until you are 18, you have to find creative ways to get around!

4. Wear everything with YMCMB on it! Hats, purses, pants, shirts EVERYTHING!

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